And now, an odd little story.

[40cakes]

My train to work passes through a run-down urban area called Elizabeth. By the tracks, there are a lot of abandoned factories and parking lots.

This morning, I had a window seat and nothing to do to entertain myself, so I just watched the familiar buildings speed by. Abandoned factory, broken windows, vacant lot with a giant face-down stuffed animal--

Wait.

In back of a small set of buildings was a giant purple Muppet looking fellow, with a tuft of pink hair. I always have a lot of love for all my toys, so whenever I see one forgotten in a store or on the side of the road, I feel a little pang of sadness for it, and for whoever must have lost it. But man, this thing was HUGE. You'd notice if you didn't have it anymore. Like, actual person sized.

What if it's a person? Maybe they were in the suit for a kids' show or a birthday party or something, and then they were a victim of brutal rape and dumped on the side of the road.* What if there's a dead person inside a Muppet costume? Or maybe Elizabeth is home to a violent furry gang war, and he's just another sad victim, fueling the flames of vengeance. I suppose if one were going to conduct a violent furry gang war in costume, you'd have the suit lined to be bulletproof, and then your homies have to pull off the costume face to see you got a bullet in your head.

What? This is the way my mind works.

*Oh, like you've never seen Vulgar.

Comments

[pinkscotch.livejournal.com]

LOL!!!!

homie, i'd pull your head off any day to find out if you're okay.

[fadingembers.livejournal.com]

I'd do the same for you, homie!

[pinkscotch.livejournal.com]

this is seriously, the funniest thing i've read so far today! i think it would take a lot to top the image of furry gang wars.

[fadingembers.livejournal.com]

I prefer to picture a bunch of people in suits, dancing and snapping fingers (paws?), a la West Side Story.

[pinkscotch.livejournal.com]

ooohh!! nice!! that's hilarious!!

[nothingjerk.livejournal.com]

I think that is very sad and very brilliant at the same time.
I say you find and rescue thsi muppet even if it means going through the rough streets or E-town

[fadingembers.livejournal.com]

I wanted to leap out of the train: "Save that Muppet!"

[derylykt.livejournal.com]

Elizabeth IS home to the most brutal gang war ever. Back in 97 there was so much foam, fake hair, and ping pong ball eyes littering the streets that the gangs were forced to call a truce so they could rebuild.

After all, Elizabeth is where the Skekses settled after filming The Dark Crystal. Troubled by lack of employment, they needed a way to make a living - a way to survive the unforgiving streets.

After the 97 furry rebellion rocked the city, the Skekses resumed quietly living, holding jobs at IKEA and Starbucks. A few parted ways and moved to Montclair to become haberdashers.

[fadingembers.livejournal.com]

Oh man, I think I remember this. It was the height of the Barney vs. Big Bird turf wars, and I think the ensuing brutality kind of shocked everyone involved into keeping their cool. I hope this doesn't lead to another flare-up.

[decembermalice.livejournal.com]

Random: What are you and Kirk doing tomorrow? I was hoping me, you, Kirk, and Aaron can do Van Goghs and some Settlers of Catan. Let me know.

[decembermalice.livejournal.com]

Aaron - my bf.

[fadingembers.livejournal.com]

Oooooh! :3 I don't believe we have any plans, and another game of Settlers sounds lovely. I'll bring it up.

[pyrobovaphiliac.livejournal.com]

It could happen. I'll keep in touch.

[imre-nico.livejournal.com]

Vulgar. *snicker* Oh eesh, I had forgotten that movie.

'a sexy clown' you know, for adult birthday parties.

STUPIDEST IDEA EVAR. MUCH REGRETTING OF IDEA ENSUES.

[fadingembers.livejournal.com]

I try to forget that movie, and then now and again it creeps back into my skull. If only there was some sort of Eternal Sunshine device for bad movies.

[imre-nico.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that and "I Spit On Your Grave" would be right in my que for memory evisceration...

[drewbie.livejournal.com]

Maybe it was No Heart and Beastly...