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Jun. 9th, 2005
Vibrator Essay of DOOM
Jun. 9th, 2005 08:22 pmHokay. Ssso.
Someone on my friends list was asking for vibrator advice, and I was all, sure I can offer some advice! And then I wrote a friggin essay. So I figured I'd post it here for posterity, and in case any of y'all wanna learn something/wanna add something/wanna point other people in this direction because you don't feel like talking to them about masturbation.
( Let the show begin. )
==
( Material Girl )
==
( As You Like It )
==
( Mom, That's Just A...Massager. ...That I'm Holding Onto for a Friend. I Swear. )
==
( A Spoonful of Lubricant... )
It kinda goes without saying this essay and the links aren't worksafe, ne? Ne.
=^..^=
ETA: Some people have asked if they can link, quote, direct their flists to this. The answer is a resounding YES! I'm typically not afraid of TMI, and intentionally left this public so any passing traveler could check it out. I'm also open to suggestions from any part of the internet from those who know more than I. (Not that I don't love the comments asking for permission, I'm just too damn lazy to reply to them all XD)
ETA 2: And people who know more than I ARE leaving comments! So when you're done reading, scroll and check out what they've said!
Someone on my friends list was asking for vibrator advice, and I was all, sure I can offer some advice! And then I wrote a friggin essay. So I figured I'd post it here for posterity, and in case any of y'all wanna learn something/wanna add something/wanna point other people in this direction because you don't feel like talking to them about masturbation.
( Let the show begin. )
==
( Material Girl )
==
( As You Like It )
==
( Mom, That's Just A...Massager. ...That I'm Holding Onto for a Friend. I Swear. )
==
( A Spoonful of Lubricant... )
It kinda goes without saying this essay and the links aren't worksafe, ne? Ne.
=^..^=
ETA: Some people have asked if they can link, quote, direct their flists to this. The answer is a resounding YES! I'm typically not afraid of TMI, and intentionally left this public so any passing traveler could check it out. I'm also open to suggestions from any part of the internet from those who know more than I. (Not that I don't love the comments asking for permission, I'm just too damn lazy to reply to them all XD)
ETA 2: And people who know more than I ARE leaving comments! So when you're done reading, scroll and check out what they've said!
Disconnected thoughts
Jun. 9th, 2005 10:21 pm- Does anyone have tips for keeping a house cool in the summer? Because I just walked 15 minutes to Walgreens, then 15 minutes back carrying three bags of groceries, in jeans, on a hot summer night* and the second I opened the apartment door, said, "Holy SHIT is it hot in here!" By comparison, my room is cooler as I have a fan and keep my door closed so the crazy people don't steal my room temperature, but it's still probably 80 degrees in here. My bed is right next to the window so I REALLY don't want to get an AC window unit, as I have horrid visions of kicking it out in the night. Thus far, I have a little fan in the window, set to high until I go to bed and it goes to low. In the morning I turn it off.
- It's official; I'm chopping my hair off. By the time we do Utena cosplay, it'll be a reasonable length again, so I'm not worried. But this is to fucking much to deal with. I'm thinking of making my appointment at Crops for Girls because not only do they participate in Locks of Love, but Hell, if I'm gonna get my hair cut short, one would hope that a place that exclusively does short haircuts on women would do my hair right.
- I only went to Walgreen's for basics. Water and milk. But they had the display full of dark chocolate M&Ms, which until now have been so hard to find for me. So I ended up spending, like, $14. Boo hiss.
- Without going into the details, week at work has been strange.
- I'm broke all the time just from paying bills, that I sometimes wonder if I should take on a part time job. But if I took on a part time job, I would never ever have free time. Or boyfriend time, since he's an hour and $2 on the turnpike away, so he usually stays on weekends. And it's summer, which is when I WANT to go out and do things, but nonetheless, I can't AFFORD to go out and do things. But the idea of it being gorgeous and beautiful out and me being stuck inside pains me. However. As part time jobs go, this one seems like it wouldn't be all that bad.**
- Ana asks me while I'm making a sandwich, "Are you using microwave?"***
"No, I'm using the toaster just to defrost my bread."
"Good, because I need plug."
I shrug and think nothing of it as she reaches behind the microwave and unplugs it. No idea what she absolutely HAS TO plug into that particular outlet, but whatever. This is Monday. Today, I go to plug the microwave back in (STILL unplugged, and I realize that the microwave has a three-pronged plug. The outlet only wants two. Then I think, "Oh. She wanted the adapter plug that allowed the plug to go into the wall."
...
YOU CRAZY BITCH, I DIDN'T MEAN I WAS NEVER USING THE MICROWAVE AGAIN!
- Hey![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
missandrony! I got my package! Hooray and thank you!
=^..^=
*Though I declined to offer my throat to the wolf with the red roses.
**And on top of working in a sex shoppe, I'd get PAID to do it! Imagine!
***For full effect, picture as said by Russian woman in Bond film.
- It's official; I'm chopping my hair off. By the time we do Utena cosplay, it'll be a reasonable length again, so I'm not worried. But this is to fucking much to deal with. I'm thinking of making my appointment at Crops for Girls because not only do they participate in Locks of Love, but Hell, if I'm gonna get my hair cut short, one would hope that a place that exclusively does short haircuts on women would do my hair right.
- I only went to Walgreen's for basics. Water and milk. But they had the display full of dark chocolate M&Ms, which until now have been so hard to find for me. So I ended up spending, like, $14. Boo hiss.
- Without going into the details, week at work has been strange.
- I'm broke all the time just from paying bills, that I sometimes wonder if I should take on a part time job. But if I took on a part time job, I would never ever have free time. Or boyfriend time, since he's an hour and $2 on the turnpike away, so he usually stays on weekends. And it's summer, which is when I WANT to go out and do things, but nonetheless, I can't AFFORD to go out and do things. But the idea of it being gorgeous and beautiful out and me being stuck inside pains me. However. As part time jobs go, this one seems like it wouldn't be all that bad.**
- Ana asks me while I'm making a sandwich, "Are you using microwave?"***
"No, I'm using the toaster just to defrost my bread."
"Good, because I need plug."
I shrug and think nothing of it as she reaches behind the microwave and unplugs it. No idea what she absolutely HAS TO plug into that particular outlet, but whatever. This is Monday. Today, I go to plug the microwave back in (STILL unplugged, and I realize that the microwave has a three-pronged plug. The outlet only wants two. Then I think, "Oh. She wanted the adapter plug that allowed the plug to go into the wall."
...
YOU CRAZY BITCH, I DIDN'T MEAN I WAS NEVER USING THE MICROWAVE AGAIN!
- Hey
missandrony! I got my package! Hooray and thank you!=^..^=
*Though I declined to offer my throat to the wolf with the red roses.
**And on top of working in a sex shoppe, I'd get PAID to do it! Imagine!
***For full effect, picture as said by Russian woman in Bond film.