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Dear Self-Insert: In the future, if you must work out your psychological issues with women, please do so with original fic, and not with canon-raping Gary Stu horseshit. Thank you.

P.S. Learn grammar.

>^..^

(no subject)

1. What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before?
Rode in a limousine on someone else's tab.

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Meh. Don't think I made any last year...

What do ya know. I did! 1-5 are in progress or done. 6 & 7 can be carried over.

This year? I want to get promoted. Be a responsible adult. Only buy toys when I have extra money around after saving and purchasing important things.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Uh...someone I used to work with...

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Not really.

5. What countries did you visit?
Sigh.

6. What would you like to have in 2005 that you lacked in 2004?
A decently full savings account. A coffee table. Heat. Free time. A Playstation 2.

7. What date from 2004 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
April 12 was the day I started my new job, ya.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting a real damn job.

9. What was your biggest failure?
That real damn job not being entirely different from my old damn job.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I have a UTI right now.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My laptop. I heart you, Bernardelli Super Secret Supercomputer.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Mine. I'm losing weight! I moved out! I'm working and getting praise for doing well!

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
My boss', more than once.

14. Where did most of your money go?
COMMUTING FROM SOUTH JERSEY TO NYC FOR SIX MONTHS.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Five years with Rob. Five. That's big.

16. What song will always remind you of 2004?
...none, really. All alt rock pretty much sounds the same now, and I can't imagine, in the future, hearing a song that will make me say, "Man, those were the days. Twenty-aught-four."

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? Happier. I have a little piece of life carved out for me.
ii. thinner or fatter? Thinner, def. See previous post. IF YOU CAN!
iii. richer or poorer? I'd say poorer, because though I make more money, I had significantly fewer expenses.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Less caring about work, more caring about people. Developed relationships with coworkers, kept friendships alive. Maybe if I'd tried harder, certain people wouldn't be batshit insane.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Spent money.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
At home with the parents and the kitties. (KITTIES!)

(where did 21 go?)
Temporal vortex.

22. Did you fall in love in 2004?
Already there. Though I did fall on the stairs at work last week.

23. How many one-night stands?
None. Even if I weren't in a relationship, you gotta WORK for this body, baby.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
This time last year, I'd say Joan of Arcadia. Now? I suppose TDS.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Hatred takes time and energy I just don't have.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
I don't think I was into HIM or VAST this time last year. Yeah for all-caps goth metal!

27. What was the best book you read?
Some books were full of plot, and some books made me think, but America: the Book wins for entertainment value.

28. What did you want and get?
A laptop. But I'm paying for half of it. An apartment. That I pay for all of.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
Apparently the jury's still out until I see Jenna Jameson in "The Masseuse".

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

Probably was home. Alone. The next day, I made a petition arguing that Britney stay married. To that other husband. Remember him? Costanza?

...You know what? I wasn't home, because I know I made the petition at work. So I was at work on my birthday.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Less political party-line bickering. Oh, and if the great Liberal leader had been elected over the lowly Republican cunt.*

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004?
Uh...comfy chic. According to shoe trends, it's not catching on.

34. What kept you sane?
Anime and the internet. Shut your hole.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Oh Jon Stewart...if only you were a few years younger and single and were working out of our studio space. We'd totally be doing it in the Hair & Makeup room.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Abstinence-only education. That'll work.

I want world peace. Therefore, I'm going to lobby for history classes where we don't teach war, and in fact say that all people have gotten along happily, because if we teach children about war, we'll warp their minds and make them want to start wars. Just like teaching kids geometry makes them go home and calculate the area of the TV instantly.

37. Who did you miss?
Next question.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
Hmmmm...too many neat new people to choose.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004:
Diamonds fuel terrorism. A hatbox full of vibrators is a girl's best friend.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
Not to put too fine a point on it,
To say I'm the only bee in your bonnet,
Make a little birdhouse in your soul.

>^..^<

* It's a joke, you see. Because I say I hate when people think only along party lines, and then say something divided only on party lines. Is that irony or juxtaposition?